Wow it's been some time since I've disappeared and yes please ignore the post before this. It's rather the lowest of time in life I'll ever experience and yes I'm forgiving but forgetting takes some time though. =)

Well much have past and I'm in the YOG + Study week break before the semester exams. And yes of course and again i'm still not prepared but I shall not let history repeat itself by studying last minute again.

This few days I've been rather busy in the mornings cos of yog. Well though it's quite tiring and much more for those who stay further away from kranji, it's really an enjoyable experience. Why? Cos we get to walk, bathe, and groom horses and eventually there would be some horses which u would favor very much.

Well this LE Lucky. Very talented in show jumping. He's got a calm behaviour and would stay extremELY still to let u scratch behind his ears. =)

Haha now this is Belcam chocolate. 2nd most favourite. Why? Cos he's got 'attitude'. But in actual fact he can be pretty nice. And yes he's been disqualified cos of his 'dangerous' behaviour. Hope someone nice would adopt him after the competitions.

Now these two are really truELY in love. No kidding when I say this cause they can't be alone from each other except during training time. Apart from that they will keep neighing loudly until they see each other. LovELY couples. =)

So much about the horses. Well back to life. I just realised that alot of people are actually expecting alot from me. I'm only studying veterinary technology and they're (church members and relatives) already asking me which country will I go to further my vet studies. I haven thought about that portion and they are all asking me the countries. And and I secretly think that my mum expects a lot from me too. Like if my room's messy she would say things like how will i survive if i study overseas and occasionally she teaches me how to cook simple meals so i can do the same when i'm 'overseas' studying. She does so many things and buys so many things for me and treats me really well. Giving me extra money when she feels that I don't have enough. And yes as a spendthrift loser here, most of the time it really comes in handy.

Then again it's hard for me to tell those around me that I'm actually only barely surviving. I don't wanna disappoint them. Especially my mum and dad who puts high hopes on me as indirectly as possible. Although their expectations can be felt so clearly.

Gosh I'm really lost. Seriously. I don't know what I wanna pursue and stuffs like that. I need help. =(

Hey hey I'm not really in a mood to blog but anyway let me contradict what i've just said. Quite down lately cos nothing seems to go right. First i accidentally bit my tongue which developed into two ulcers, top and bottom of my tongue. Because of this, I had to eat in pain for a week. Next, just when my tongue got slightly better.. I developed throat inflammation. (the anti-biotics keep giving me diarrhea too) Haha the irony is that I'm currently actually really studying on acute and chronic inflammation. (But that's besides the point)

Finally, my throat's feeling better and flu steps in giving me slight fever and runny nose. Sometimes it's really depressing when nothing goes right. Yup, especially when we always wanna be the one not at fault. but if we put that all aside and take a step back to see things much clearly, we would get the whole picture. That if we're that capable at all we would just do it ourselves instead of giving the issue to somebody else to clear the mess if something goes off plan or to gain credit for ourselves when things go right. Sometimes the way we manipulate others because it's easy to do so and resource saving speaks a lot on our character and how realistic we are. Sometimes I don't really bother thinking, but no matter how easy i am, i still know that there's a clear distinction between slaves and friends. If we treat our friends like slaves; doing stuffs that we ourselves can do, there wouldn't be a difference between slavery and friendship.

I know sometimes we seem blur or even act blur to get out of situations. Why don't we just face it. There wouldn't be any misunderstandings and better still, we'll feel more cherished and less 'neglected'. If we wanna put it correctly, we wouldn't feel neglected at all if our thoughts are more true. (What we wanna do and why) I'm sure communication between all of us would be much clearer and sincere.

I not even sure if i can sure if i can comply to everything I've just stated. But if I'm willing to just do a particular change bit by bit everyday. I'm sure things would work out for me definitely. Oh well, I hope things get better yea~~ Ohh Gosh I start school tmr at 8am. Goodnight! =)

Hahahahas i just realised this is my 201 post. It took me like roughly three and a half years to reach these many post. Twitter is alot more easier and yea that's why my blog's been kinda 'dead'.

Okies many many many things have gone by and i'm just shocked by how fast time really fly man. And yes i realised that i've been rather depressed lately. Like so many things happening; Mostly bad. Like my current common test results which are the worst of all sems like i've mentioned in my tweets.. It was much worse than the worse i had expected. Imagine that.

I still can remember the time when my close friends told me how crazy i am to go Vet Tech. And i just told them that interest comes first. And yes i really like this course, my classmates especially and most of the people in this course. But till today i still ain't progressing. i still carry the secondary school mentality; Working hard only when the exams come. But it won't work now that stuffs i learn now are much heavier in content and 60% is based on continuous assessment.

I'm kinda tired of saying i'll do well in future because i always don't mean what i say. But I think i know what to do. (hopefully)

It's hard not to right?

This is the best picture taken for brownie during ACM (animal care and management) in school. Sorry Joey couldn't help but post this.

Salad which i helped my mum to prepare during my sis 21st birthday.

Metabolic Chemistry lab. Reminds me of sec. sch days chemistry practicals. (and of course the chem teacher who always look down on me and finally dealing with me by sending me to another class. Haha, memories memories memories)

My favourite coffee!! (mocha) I would rank this first in my MOST favourite drink. =)

And yes one of my major drawings.

The finale. (like finallllllllly) =)

This is only the super summerised events that are happening in my so very hectic life. Nowadays I'm also not colouring my fonts anymore cos it takes alot time. Anyways life's filled with alot of problems and yes I'm really stressed. And through all this problems, I found out another something about myself. Although I may get hurt easily, but I forgive as easily as I get hurt. (forgetting it might take some time though)

Anyways I feel crappish this few days. As in I keep talking crap uncontrollably. I needa control my mouth. Hahahas. Before my friends start slapping me. Anyways my term test is next week and yes i got a lot of catching up to do!! Shall chiong now.

=)

I really wanna do something like this and forget the world. It's too much for me. I can't take it. =(

WOW no time no time no time no time no time no time no time!!!!

I barely squeezed out some time to write here. And I really have lots to say. But I always forget when I'm actually typing it down. Anyways school's been really busy with project datelines, test, drawings (Ohh crap i haven started and it's due on tuesday!!! =X) and some yog online learning due on the 22nd of may!!

Can someone like save me like seriously. =( Today i woke up at 2pm today cos i slept at 730am this morning. Gosh I don't think studying overnight works for me. I was too tired to study so i ended up either talking or eating to stay awake. (Hope I didn't offend anyone but, I really wasted my time ytd) I'll stick to studying in the night (not overnight). =)

Today I played dota, went to church, went to uncle's place and then back home to watch IP MAN 2 online and then played dota again.. And here i am blogging with my whole body aching (seriously every part of the body cause of ytd's jog round bedok reservoir) and with a deep sense of guilt for not studying. This guilt is far worse than not studying for 'O' Levels and i'm not sure why. Why the guilt? Cos there's Fpath test on mon, drawings submission on tues and Fpath online test on wed and not forgetting my research submission to my group leader due today (sunday)

With all this stress built up.. I start to lose my appetite just thinking of work. I've just been told by the doctor that I actually have irritable bowel syndrome. And it's like off and on. Oh well hope things get better. Goodnight.

I have lost myself.

Ohmy Ohmy I'm lost. I'm not sure what's going on. I can't seem to concentrate. And I'm feeling very guilty for not touching much of my homework. With only one more day left before monday blues steps in. I must really stop dota-ing, ahhh shouldn't have gey kiang start playing when i managed to stop. =(

Ohyes, school's started and it really feels different. I would say weird cos maybe some of us might not have seen each other for weeks. Anyways on the bright side I think i'm just being paranoid according to luckybluebirds. Yes time flies and yea we all in year 2. Alot is excepted from us now like nobody's gonna like scold us for not studying. It's all about initiative which is what I'm currently struggling with.

Anyways my saving plan was a total failure, which means I'm really broke. GOSH someone save me. Goodnight!

Bro's early 16th birthday celebration at my uncle's place. (As you can see there are two cakes.. goes to show how much we all eat.. Monsters) =P

K lah we actually hardly take photo together cos we're all so busy. Must cherish this photo. =)

Okies I went to town today again! And this time round I realised that I do have alot of things i wanna get. (Like only three items)

-A jacket

-A slipper

-An i-touch

Although it's just three items but it's gonna be really Ex! Shall keep everybody in suspense about where i'll get my items. LOL!! (Lame I know)

Shortly after 'shopping' I went to uncle's place to celebrate bro's 16th birthday. Got so many gifts. (envious) Anyways my bro is like finally 16th. Looking forward to his 18th and then finally 21st. Why you might ask. Cos the older he gets means the more matured he'll be. Then we would understand each other much better. And there would be less immature quarreling. Which means I'm sure I'll benefit the most when my bro grows up. =)

Okies sadly school's like gonna open TMR!! Yes and yes. It's the end of the 'LONG' vacation. Did alot of thinking during this break and I'm all set to move on with my study life. NO MORE FOOLING AROUND MR. CHOW YI LAI, ELY. Please arh tolong tolong. Adding on, I wanna be more thrifty. Hopefully my budget plan would work. =)

Actually i've more to say but I really needa re-adjust my nocturnal clock to the usual time. So yup those around me who are starting and have started. JIAYOU!!!!!! =) =)

PHOTOS STOLEN FROM JOEY LO'S HTC HD2 5 MEGA PIXEL!!!

YEAH!! I'm back and I've survive FOW and FOC; not by participating in the games and stuffs they have for the freshies but by doing the most tedious part of the camp. LOGISTICS!! And I'm really proud to say the word Logistics. (not in a show-off kinda tone but as a normal logger myself)

During the 7 days camp, which was no joke, And we all worked together so nicely (of course plus and minus those part where we all were so drained we just didn't want to talk to anyone) that i didn't realised until the end of the camp when our log heads serene and ann hin told us during the debrief that we had about 9-13 fluctuating loggers and still managed to pull through the logistics section of the camp. Believe me and we still had time to play monopoly, bridge and many more! =P

Yup and sadly it's the end of the camp. i'll really miss my experience working with those around me and especially annhin and serene whom both have graduated from TP and are moving on to their next phase of life in university soon. Good luck in both of your endeavours. =)

And yes myself. It's seems I understand myself much better after this camp. I now know that being a programmer and Gl (group leader) is totally out of my options for next year's FOW and FOC. Because no matter what i still do have the shy and introvert nature still lingering in me. And yes i really dislike crowds. And another thing is about how I work with people. Anyways matter what I'm still I.

Yo that's me!! =)